Grief, Gratitude & Hype about Hallucinations
Today, 4 years ago, on #ValentinesDay, my brother Nocky died of a heart attack at the age of 46. Like any brother and sister, we had a few moments. Like the time at the bus stop in elementary school, an older boy was picking on him. I jumped to his ‘rescue’, which did not make Nocky my fan. Or the time that I let him borrow my car (against my parents’ rules), and he wrecked it!
However, over the years, we grew very close, and his death is a wound that will never fully heal. In my mind, I hug him often and tell him how much I love him. I find comfort in telling stories about him, like this one.
Me: (Singing in the car)
Nocky: Marie, who sings that song?
Me: (stop singing to answer) Stevie Nicks
Nocky: You should let her sing it!
What does this have to do with #Floating, you may ask? Well, today, as I stepped into the cabin, I was thinking about him. In the dark quiet of the float, I thought about how fortunate I was to have him, how much I wished he could see @RedLotusFloat, how his death changed our family, how much my heart hurts with missing him. As my mind cycled, as it often does during meditation, I found the ‘sweet spot’ in my grief called gratitude. I took that gratitude and moved my focus to picturing others that I love, here and gone, holding them with love in my meditation. While celebrating #love on this day, albeit mostly a commercial holiday, I challenge you to #meditate on the beauty and risk involved in the worthy calling of love.
Floatation Therapy gives me 90 minutes alone to not only hear my heartbeat but to feel what is in my heart. I am grateful to be alive and to have the opportunity to express it with #loveinaction!
Switching gears now to discuss the hype around hallucinations in the float!
Does being in the #FloatCabin (or #tank) cause them? I cannot tell you how many times I have been asked this question. I should note that sometimes the question is asked with hope or fear. In my opinion both distract the floater from the experience at hand.
There is much in the media, real and exaggerated, on this topic. Here is what I can tell you.
Everyone is different, and many people have shared some enthralling experiences with me about their floats – none have been scary or even what I would consider a hallucination per se.
Personally, I find the float very freeing – both physically and mentally. I have had moments when I don’t feel like I am in my body or that I am in the water. I have had some really interesting and vivid #dreams. I have had breakthroughs in thinking and tangible solutions about the challenges I was facing. I have cried, laughed, slept, stretched, and meditated.
With well over 100 floats logged, the closest I have come to a hallucination was seeing a very bright light in the cabin, as if the lights had come on, yet, they were NOT on. Nothing too exciting compared to what I have heard about in movies or media. This, again, is my own experience.
What’s my point? If you are coming to the float to have some amazeballs hallucination – maybe you will, maybe you won’t. My experience says that if my focus is so pointed at one thing, I miss out on what is really happening. I suggest coming to the float with little to no #expectations and allowing yourself to be present for the float, as is.
Floating is a profoundly personal experience, and I believe it is meant to be. I hope that you make time for yourself to relax, take care of yourself and let yourself go a litte.
Be Well My #FloatyFriends